Posted in Funny Poem a Day

Funny Poem a Day: On the Benefits of Genetic Engineering, by John Rice

I had a little break there from posting, sorry about that – book to get ready to send off! It’s nearly done, now. Today’s poem is by John Rice – there are two children’s poets called John Rice and both are excellent. It’s this John Rice today! John has sent a poem about a genetically-engineered octopus that is now an octopussy. I can reveal that Lola would not ever want any animal in the house that resembles a cat whatsoever. She was deeply jealous of our cat, Milla, shown in the picture above. She tolerated her. If I showed any love at all for Milla, Lola’s face was a picture of absolute outrage. Thank you for the poem, John!

 

On the Benefits of Genetic Engineering

I want an octo-pussy cat:
I know that it won’t purr
But at least I’m not allergic
To octo-pussy fur.

© John H Rice

 

Joke:

What did the octopus say to his girlfriend when he proposed?

¿ǝƃɐıɹɹɐɯ uı puɐɥ puɐɥ puɐɥ puɐɥ puɐɥ puɐɥ puɐɥ puɐɥ ɹnoʎ ǝʌɐɥ I ʎɐW

 

Posted in A to Z Blog Challenge 2018

R is for Children’s Poet John H. Rice, #AtoZChallenge #ZtoA

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John H Rice

How many children’s poets called John Rice do you need? It turns out it’s TWO! J. H. Rice has spent thirty years working in primary education. He has worked as a teacher, headteacher, assessor, teacher trainer and writer in education and has long held a passion for children’s poetry.  Appearing in anthologies published both nationally and internationally, he thinks of his own poems as small creatures: some are quite tame but others are not entirely trustworthy. His website is here.

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Here is a great hippopoem by him:

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Hippopotamouse

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Beware the hippopotamouse
Ignore his toothsome grin
If you ever hear him knocking
You must not let him in

He’ll soon invite all of his friends –
They’ll be there in a trice
And no-one wants a house that’s full
Of hippopotamice

They’ll seize your cheese, they’ll gnaw your floor
They’ll make a dreadful fuss;
Worse than this, the holes they make are
Hippopot-anormous

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© John H Rice

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Freedom Poem for National Poetry Day by John H Rice

 

 

The Art of Kite Flying

 

“It’s the string that makes it fly,” he said

As the kite tugged wildly at its thread.

“Without the string, it falls and dies –

Collapses from these bright blue skies,

Yet still it battles to break free

But it is just a kite, you see.”

And then he stopped and turned his head,

“So, what’s your string?” the old man said.

 

© John H Rice

 

John H Rice is a former primary school headteacher who writes educational materials for children – and poems!