Posted in Funny Poem a Day

Funny Poem a Day – Masterpiece Mum, by Sarah Ziman

Lola does not paint very often, she is not that artistic, but just occasionally she makes her mark for a good cause. She is a passionate believer in libraries and books and reading – as you can see from her poster.

Thank you to Sarah Ziman for the today’s poem – I think you will see the connection to the above subject, once you have read it!

 

Masterpiece Mum

 

My face is shaped like a potato,

I’ve got rather odd coloured skin –

one eye is up high on my forehead,

and the other is nearer my chin.

My cabbage leaf ears are enormous,

my earrings could be nuts and bolts,

for my hair just imagine a hedgehog –

who’s somehow received ninety volts.

My cheeks are as red as two cherries,

my teeth are a giant white bridge,

but you can tell from my grin that I’m happy –

and I’m proud to be stuck to the fridge!

 

© Sarah Ziman

Posted in Funny Poem a Day

Funny Poem a Day: Traffic Jam by Sarah Ziman

This is me and my daughter walking Lola when she was very small, in Wells, Somerset. There was something very cute about Lola when she was a puppy, so eager to get out and explore everything she had to be a step in front of her ability to take everything in. She caused several traffic jams in the village with people hanging out of their car windows to see and ask what sort of dog she was – she was 10 years old in December last year, and there weren’t so many Australian labradoodles around 10 years ago, and certainly very few cockerpoos, which nowadays many people presume she is.

So today’s poem about a traffic jam is by Sarah Ziman – thank you, Sarah!

 

Traffic Jam

 

Cars of silver, red, and blue

Motorbikes and buses too

 

Put them in your biggest pan

Stir them with a caravan

 

Measure sugar – half a cup

Next a lorry, broken up

 

Petrol, or perhaps some oil

Carefully begin to boil

 

Simmer for an hour at most –

Traffic jam to spread on toast!

 

© Sarah Ziman

 

Joke:

Why did the skeleton cross the road?

¡doɥS ʎpoq ǝɥʇ oʇ ʇǝƃ oʇ